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View Full Version : the sticky drooly dilemma



fox in socks
08-22-2010, 02:54 PM
disclaimer: certainly my dilemma makes me sound snotty and prissy pants and all that shit. so really no need to rehash the obvious, so haters, dont hate.

dilemma: so we bought this house. its lovely. we have lovely new carpet and a new fancy schmancy couch. the dilemma is we have good friends with a kid. wee kidlet/toddler who rocks the sticky and the drooly. i cant lie you guys, this kid is either sticky hands, crumb face or drooling whenever ive seen him.

example: on a recent visit, they gave their kid a sandwich to eat in which the kid subsequently got PB&J all over our porch chairs and porch and himself. :eek: i had to wipe and hose the chairs down. they offered to clean up the hot mess, but i figured id do a better job--so theyre not totally rude....

so, the dilemma is, we want to have a little get together. unless we flat out say "no children allowed", they bring their kid and the kid has the high potential to drool on our couch. or our new carpet. new area rugs. and i dont want to be a dick all "you cant feed your child here", but i guess its unkind to put the kid out on the porch if its rainy and cold...... i wouldnt mind the kid so much but for that stuff. im not a total dick, but i just really hate drool and i really hate crumby and messy.

so snobby me, im wondering if anyone else has ever had this where they dont enjoy sticky and drooly on their nice stuff. i often wonder how some people with kids manage to keep their shit looking really tops.

Lo
08-22-2010, 05:22 PM
Can't you just tell them that we only eat food in the kitchen? It obviously goes without saying that most kids are messy eaters, but it shouldn't be a problem to clean it up in the kitchen. I don't know what to tell you about the drool.

Jezebelle
08-22-2010, 05:38 PM
I agree. See if they can bring some kind of portable chair (they're pretty easy to come by) if they intend to feed their child. Then, the child only eats in that. It isn't rude whatsoever - you have a new house with lovely things and kids are filthy.

Churumbela
08-22-2010, 08:37 PM
I think Lo is absolutely right. I don't have children, but I as a guest in someone's house, I only eat in the areas where I have been given permission to eat. I don't think it would be rude of you to say, "In our new home, we would really appreciate it if slobberface only eats in the kitchen."

But then again, I also don't think it's rude of you to say that it's meant to be an adults only get-together. Unlike that wackadoo blogger, I really do believe there are certain places where children are not and should not be welcome, and if I had brand new furniture, I'd want that to be one of those places. ;)

fox in socks
08-22-2010, 08:43 PM
indeed they are dead messy. as an aside, im also nervous about adults, red wine and our stuff. surely some of my pre-emptive nervousness is that transition for piecemeal apartment type furniture to proper quality things. but thats another issue for another day....

the portable chair is a nice idea. another idea is having our get together after typical meal times. so maybe they'll do their eating before coming over and can just let him sleep while the adults drink adult things.

as for the drool--i dont know.

maybe we should have an outside party :)
eta: even if its winter!

eeta: i think part of why i feel we can buy these things is not planning to have kids. obviously it would be a dangerous choice to buy lovely wool rugs (srsly lovely) and also decide on weans. plastic on the furniture would be the next step!

Churumbela
08-22-2010, 08:46 PM
If the weather is nice and you have a yard, that might just be an easier choice.

Kala
08-23-2010, 04:05 AM
Some people eat in every room of their house. Fine. But when it comes to your home, you set the rules. When people (adults & children alike) come to our place, they eat in either the kitchen or at the patio table if we're grilling.

Re: the drool thing - I can offer no solutions. Thank fuck I don't have friends with toddlers.

And this is Childfree. No disclaimer necessary I should hope.

fox in socks
08-23-2010, 09:05 AM
true re disclaimer.im so used to needing a pre-emptive strike! great solutions re: getting the grub on here. the drooling---i suppose theres really no out other than keeping the kid off the sofa/rug or waiting until he has adequate saliva management. i cant fathom my level of pissed to have stains on something because of someone else--worse: their child.

jeth
08-23-2010, 10:20 AM
I don't think you need to worry. You set the boundaries, you explain why the kid can't go in the living room. If they don't like it, they can leave the kid at home or not join you at all. The wishes of the hosts should come before anybody else's personal desires.

ontheindianside
08-23-2010, 11:42 AM
Seriously, make it an adults' only party. If you have several friends with kids, they can pool together for a sitter.

JayPeaches
08-23-2010, 02:29 PM
Seriously, make it an adults' only party.
I've been struggling with this lately. ALL of my friends have kids (I know, I need some new friends), so every time I host an adult-only party, I'm lucky if two people show up. Even with advance notice, invitations, etc. T thinks we ought to just host a kid-friendly party, but I really just don't want to. I would be totally stressed out leading up to the party, and hate everyone's kids during and after the party.

Frangipani
08-23-2010, 03:08 PM
I'm having the same problem, except it's with dogs not kids. This dude brings over his 4 dogs when he comes over, one has urinated on my subwoofer, so i already told him that particular dog is not allowed in my house any more. Problem is the other dogs have fleas, and I just treated my dog and sanitized my house. I guess I'm just gonna have ta be a cunt and tell dude his dogs cant come inside. I guess thats an easier feat than bitching about someones' kids. But not too far off though.

space dog
08-23-2010, 03:12 PM
I think it is totally fine to say no kids. If you want to have kids (or at least the people attached to the kids), you could set up a room for the kids with games or a movie. That's what we tend to do - a projector and the Iron Giant goes over well. You could even do it outside with blankets like a little party. If its only one kid, it might not work.

ontheindianside
08-24-2010, 12:04 PM
I think it is totally fine to say no kids. If you want to have kids (or at least the people attached to the kids), you could set up a room for the kids with games or a movie. That's what we tend to do - a projector and the Iron Giant goes over well. You could even do it outside with blankets like a little party. If its only one kid, it might not work.

That's a good idea. Also, if it's only one kid, you have even more ammunition to implement a "No Kids" rule and something backing you up - the complete absence of anyone else who feels the need to bring a child to a party.

Alizarin Crimson
08-25-2010, 01:31 AM
No parent I know (related to or not) takes offense at putting a drop cloth under the child seat as well, whether you're in the kitchen or dining room :) If they don't have one, a cheap plastic sheet works.

Autumn
08-25-2010, 03:44 PM
I've been struggling with this lately. ALL of my friends have kids (I know, I need some new friends), so every time I host an adult-only party, I'm lucky if two people show up. Even with advance notice, invitations, etc. T thinks we ought to just host a kid-friendly party, but I really just don't want to. I would be totally stressed out leading up to the party, and hate everyone's kids during and after the party.

I don't know why people would want to bring their kid to a party. Seriously, it's an opportunity to GTF away from a brat for awhile. Why wouldn't you?!

I also don't understand why people with children wouldn't ask if it's a kid friendly party. I mean, you'd ask before you brought your dog, or an additional guest or whatever. Why would you not ask about that? People are so damn rude.

Frangipani
08-25-2010, 04:09 PM
No parent I know (related to or not) takes offense at putting a drop cloth under the child seat as well, whether you're in the kitchen or dining room :) If they don't have one, a cheap plastic sheet works.

I would take offense (if i were a CF'er hosting a little get together) if a parent expected me to chase after their gobble child with plastic sheets. If you have a tornado of fluids and crumbs, you can bring your own drop cloth.

JayPeaches
08-25-2010, 04:10 PM
I also don't understand why people with children wouldn't ask if it's a kid friendly party. I mean, you'd ask before you brought your dog, or an additional guest or whatever. Why would you not ask about that? People are so damn rude.
Oh, I have this one friend (not really a friend anymore, partially because of this shit) who not only insists on bringing her kid everywhere, but has the brattiest, most ill-behaved kid I have ever encountered. I once found her drawing with crayons all over my fridge and Julie was standing RIGHT THERE, doing nothing about it. WTF?! She frequently uses the excuse, "Well, I couldn't find a sitter." She even brought that brat to book club once, where we were supposed to be discussing a very adult book but couldn't because we all had to watch what we were saying. Another time her kid grabbed a handful of cat litter with poop in it and dumped it on the floor just before she locked herself in my office with my cat.

I could go on and on but I'm already getting pissed just thinking about it. ;l

fox in socks
08-26-2010, 12:38 AM
crayons on your fridge!?!?!?!? all up in your cat litter? thats grounds for a caning no? seriously, that is ridiculous.

i am surprised how friends who i thought were sane people turn out as parents. the rudeness! we were expected to be on our better than best fucking behavior as guests at others. i got yelled at for even thinking about trouble. i remember when drooly tornado (thanks nova) was at ours and drooled his long string of drool on our floor. mom says to her husband "oh! hes drooling" and there it sat pooled on my floor until i went and cleaned it up. really? thats was my thing to fix? do what you want at your own house, but at mine its really rude to leave drool and peanut butter all about.

Monique
08-26-2010, 12:48 PM
I just had my niece and her two young children staying with me and they would eat in the dinning area and then get down and run about with food all over them touching things, walls furniture, electronics etc. I did what another member suggested and bought a strap in booster chair so I could clean them before they could run a muck. I still had to scrub the table, top and bottom as well as backs, fronts and all sides of my dinning chairs multiple times a day. I felt like I am some crazy childless neat freak. (Which is probably true) Within a few days the littlest one had his dirty hands on my plasma TV and ended up causing a light scratch. The upside is, I may be cured of ever wanting children.